As I say in my popular (and explicitly risqué) audiobook, Oooooh . . . Say it Again: Mastering the Fine Art of Verbal Seduction and Aural Sex, women are the gatekeepers and final decision-makers when it comes to a man and a woman engaging in sexual activities.
With incidents of rape, date-rape, and other variations of sexual assault being the exception, a woman must voluntarily open her legs to some degree for a man to insert his penis into her vagina to proceed with sexual intercourse. Many have nicknamed women ‘the receivers’ when it comes to describing their roles in sexual relations because men enter their bodies as opposed to a vice versa scenario.
Given this fact, any woman who is unmarried but actively engaging in vaginal intercourse should be taking every precaution necessary to prevent herself from ‘unexpectedly’ getting pregnant. The key words are ‘should be.’ We all know that this does not happen.
Let’s keep things 100: The number of out-of-wedlock births, particularly in the Black community, are out of control (and have been ever since the 1970s). One-hundred years ago, only a small percentage of women in this country were bold enough to sneak and engage in sexual relations with men without being married to them, and even a significantly smaller percentage of women were careless enough to allow themselves to get pregnant. I discuss this in more detail in my book, The Beta Male Revolution: Why Many Men Have Totally Lost Interest in Marriage in Today’s Society.
In the early and middle years of the 20th Century, there were no such terms as ‘Baby Mama’ or ‘Baby Daddy.’ Then came the protests by many women during the Second Wave of Feminism, and the next thing you know, women felt free to have sex with any man they wanted to, whenever they wanted to, regardless of if that man was their husband, their fiancé, their long-term boyfriend, or even a new male acquaintance whom they may have just met 24-48 hours prior to agreeing to have sex with him.
Women wanted total control over their own bodies, and society said, “Okay. Fine. Now, you have it.” So … if a woman experiences an ‘unexpected’ pregnancy, why do some women place at least fifty-percent or more of the blame on men? Is it a man’s job to prevent a woman from experiencing an unwanted and unexpected pregnancy, or is it HER job? A woman can choose to give up a baby for adoption, or she can choose to have an abortion. Remember fellas … women FOUGHT for the right to CHOOSE what to do with the unborn babies that are growing in their wombs.
If a man impregnates a woman, what CHOICE does HE have? Can he choose to give the baby up for adoption without the woman’s consent? No. Can he choose to have the unborn baby aborted even if the woman wants to keep the baby? No. Men have no legal rights and no legal choices when it comes to making decisions for an unborn baby. Yet, when a man fails to propose marriage to a woman who is pregnant with his baby or refuses to agree to assist her financially in raising a son or daughter that he did not ask for and did not intend to have, he is immediately labeled by society a ‘Deadbeat Dad?’
This is extremely unfair to men, to say the least. There are some ‘Deadbeat Dads’ who I do tend have criticisms of, but there are other men who have been labeled as such that I will vehemently defend. If a man once had an active relationship with his child(ren), but then because he fell out with his ex-wife, he all the sudden began ignoring his child(ren) and failing to support them financially, then this type of man deserves to be harshly criticized. Even if a man was never married to the mother of his child(ren), if he initially agreed to be active in their lives and offer financial support for his son(s) and/or daughter(s) – but then later changed his mind – then he deserves to be harshly criticized.
On the other hand, when a man makes it crystal clear to a woman from the beginning that he is only interested in engaging in a few episodes of short-term, non-monogamous ‘casual’ sex with her, and that he has no desire to be involved in any type of long-term relationship or marriage with her nor does he have any desire whatsoever to raise children with her, then that woman should make every effort to secure multiple methods of birth control … or she should avoid engaging in sexual activity with that man altogether.
Again, let’s keep things 100: Many women in society set out to become a man’s Baby Mama. Some women scheme and strategize to get pregnant by a specific man. They intentionally allow themselves to get pregnant by certain men so that they can purposely have that man’s baby. For example, a few months ago I had a fraternity brother share with me that his most recent Baby Mama told him after giving birth to his youngest son, “I knew when I met you that I was going to get pregnant by you. I planned this.” He had no desire to have another child. Women can get away with this sort of thing regularly in this lenient, gynocentric society.
It is time for men to protest. It is time for men to emphatically argue the case that men too should have rights when it comes to unwanted and unexpected pregnancies. If a woman can choose to have an abortion, she should have to gain the consent of the biological father. If a woman can choose to give up her baby for adoption, she should have to gain the consent of the biological father. If a woman can choose to keep her out-of-wedlock baby, then a man should be able to choose whether he wants to financially support the baby or not.
The 1960s and 1970s changed things drastically for women. The time is now for men to stand up for themselves.