“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.”
Babatunde Umanah, a fellow writer here at the negromanoshpere.com, posted an excellent article (https://negromanosphere.com/2017/06/28/black-men-really-fear-things/) in response to a Facebook post by one Miss Ikora Ray.
If you haven’t seen her post or read his wonderful, previously mentioned article, allow me to summarize her post. She posts, things that black men fear, followed by four thumbnail pics. The first picture is of a job application. The second picture is of a white police officer. The third picture is of a wedding ring. The final picture is of a dark skinned black woman with natural hair.
Often times when people make such bombastic claims, what they are really doing in fact is projection how they feel, or in this case, their insecurities on to you. If one were to simply reverse the statements back on to the user, the truth usually reveals itself.
If I may, brothers please allow me to do just that. See, once you dissect this asinine assertion, you’ll find a lot of projection in Miss Ikora Ray’s words. You’ll also find that they ring true not just for her, but for a great many sisters. Here are four things that Black women aren’t merely afraid of, but deathly terrified of.
- The Fact That Despite All Their Education, They Make Less Than Black Men:
As I said, often times one projects their insecurities onto others. Simply reversing the words back onto their caster will often reveal the truth. In the first thumbnail of her post, Ikora Ray claims that black men are afraid of employment. In actuality, how can this be true? It is a fact that has been verified many times by many sources that black men, who are supposedly less educated than black women, earn more money, and have a higher net worth than our educated black female counterparts. So, if black men are so afraid of employment, how can this be true? The answer really isn’t that hard if she, and people like here would think for a minute. Lots of men, black or otherwise, have jobs in the trades or have technical certificates.
Anyone that knows anything will tell you that a certification means that you can actually do the work, whereas a degree means that you understand the theory. Both have value and their own merits. Often times men will forgo a degree to get certified because it is less expensive and puts them in the job market faster. Thus, they aren’t saddled with high student loan debt, and as a result their debt to income ratio is higher, and thus their net worth is higher.
- The Fact That They Aren’t In Control
The second thumbnail was of a police officer. This implies that black men are afraid of the police. Given all that we’ve deal with not just in the last few years, but period from police officers killing black men and getting away with it, how could we not have a fear of the police? Truthfully, I wouldn’t even call it fear. In the military we call it situational awareness. Knowing and understanding what’s going on with the people around you can save your life. Again, let’s turn these words back on the caster. She is saying this and the people who agree with it are doing so because, again they’re projecting. She’s projecting the fact that black women have no real power. There are notable exceptions, as there are to everything. But by and large, and in the aggregate they don’t. That’s why they love to spew things like how black men don’t build anything for their women. People like her love to say how the white man takes care of the white woman, etc. The simple truth is black women may have power in the court of public opinion, but are severely lacking in real power.
- Not Being Chosen
The third thumbnail in her absurd post is one of a wedding ring. Of course this is not at all subtle. It is clearly saying that black men are afraid of marriage. If that were so, which it is not, let’s look at why. In our postmodern society, marriage is simply not as attractive, or as necessary as it used to be. For many men, black or otherwise, it simply offers no tangible positive that can’t be obtained through other means.
For example, I am married. I have been for 9 years and have two children with my wife, my black wife that I love dearly. While I don’t regret being married and having a family, the simple truth is I could still be my children’s father without being married to their mother. I could still parent them without being married. Factor in that women are almost always awarded alimony and/or child support and custody of the kids and the prospect of marriage become an even more unacceptable option for men period, but brothers in this case. Also, for good measure, throw in the fact that more than half of all marriages end in divorce and you will have to split your assets, often times assets that you earned on your own, and idea of marriage becomes even more untenable for men, in this case black.
What Ikora Ray and her followers are really doing, again, are projecting their insecurities. What insecurity is that? In this case, it’s the fact that they might not be chosen.
Black women love to boast about how independent they are and how they don’t need a man. That is nothing but proud rhetoric used to distract us from the truth. The truth as that no matter how much they try to convince you otherwise, the majority of these sisters aren’t marriage material and won’t be chosen. They know this and this bullshit about brothers not wanting to marry, or as Ikora Ray implies, are afraid of it, is just a shamming tactic. However, it won’t work because many brothers know the deal.
- Real Black Men
Now, we’ve come to their biggest fear of them all brothers, us. Black women like Ikora Ray are terrified to death of real brothers. They are terrified to death of black men who are unapologetically masculine, and think our own thoughts. It fills them with abject terror when they can’t control a brother through their usual means, and by which I mean pussy. It pisses them off to the core know a black man can have, and express his opinions and demand that is needs and wants be seen in the same light as theirs. It angers them deeply that we don’t seek their approval. What’s particular intriguing about the final thumbnail that she used is that is of a black woman with natural hair. Honestly, how representative of black women on the whole is this? Brothers, don’t be fooled by this foolishness. Like I said, men like us, are their worst nightmares. If it weren’t so, why do they spend so much time trying to police our opinions? Why do they spend so much time trying to shut down any black man brazen enough to have an opinion that runs counter to theirs? Make no mistake about it, they’re afraid, and they should be.