Kenyan women have been likened to queens and are known to be independent and aggressive. Just look at Lupita Nyong’o who took over the world by storm.
I would however like to tell the world that they shouldn’t be fooled. There is a breed of Kenyan women which is primitive, disoriented and full of utter gibberish. You will notice them in the ever bubbly Nairobi night life sipping on 3rd grade and champagne and updating their instagram.
And their behavior stinks!
And it’s about time we took and stand and call out the balderdash. We cannot be having a set of women working hard on their careers, raising families and supporting their men while the rest of them just continue derailing the progression wagon.
And which are these women I’m talking about?
Well, the first type of woman I would like to talk about is the Nairobi girl who can’t hold down her alcohol. She is always hitting up your phone asking to be taken out for a drink but what starts off very simple ends being a grave mistake.
Considering most Kenyan men are gentlemen, you end up taking her to one of those cool joints in Kilimani only for her to be done with a whole bottle of whiskey in an hour. Next thing you know she’s getting ratchet at the back of the club with some random niggas grinding and kissing them. And it doesn’t stop there. She starts falling on other people’s tables and pouring their drinks while screaming at the bouncer; mind you he’s over 270 pounds.
And when she’s causing all this fuss, she expects you to step in for her and defend her in her mediocrity and feels entitled to question you if you take a step back. Fortunately she blacks only to puke and ruin your car carpet as you take her home.
The second type of Kenyan woman that’s completely annoying is the borrower. You meet her today and tomorrow she sends you a text asking for a small loan. Apparently she got a small emergency and she didn’t have anyone to turn to. Since you are a nice guy, you send her 2000 bob only for her to come back the next week to ask for more. Ad mind you, you are yet to hit it. You trudge on because well, she looks like Bernice Burgos with Rihanna’s voice.
And she finally comes through after having milked you dry and you hit only for her to ask to leave with your jacket, cologne and car. That’s when you say no and the next thing you see is her badmouthing you on snap chat.
The most irritating of them all has to be the perennial time waster. It’s been a month now and you still don’t know where you stand with her. But here is the thing, she never turns down dates when you holla and she always has the audacity to tag along her girlfriends where they combine forces to mint all your money.
But when you ask to take her home or ask that she comes over sometimes, she never lacks an excuse. The last time she alleged that her mother had been detained at the airport and she had to go and sort out that issue but if you can remember your conversation on the first date, she stated that her mother had passed away when she was a child.
And it’s not your fault that you found yourself in this predicament. Mostly men don’t think logically when it comes to vagina and her constantly flirting and letting you touch her bum when you hug has just been giving you all these ideas.
Now that’s the breed of Kenyan women we want phased out. It’s either you want this d*ck or you don’t. Fucking make a decision!
Actually I take back my words; there is a worse type of woman than the perennial time waster. There is the abiding whiner and gossiper. Nothing you ever do ever makes her happy and most of your days are spent talking about her looser friends and colleagues.
All you want to do is bust a nut but she can’t stop talk talking about her colleague Jennifer and how she’s throwing herself to the boss to get a promotion. And do you remember that time you guys were asked to leave a restaurant after she was caught bad mouthing another couple in the restaurant?
Do you really deserve that son? Let’s emancipate ourselves!