If there is one concept that is discussed quite frequently in the manosphere, it is one known as The 80-20 Rule Theory. It is considered a ‘theory’ because there has never been any concrete evidence to prove the validity of it, but that said, many single heterosexual men treat this ‘rule’ as if it is a scientific fact.
What are the basics of this ‘rule’? Why is this theory discussed so frequently by men in today’s manosphere?
AS A MAN, WHAT DO YOU NEED TO OFFER WOMEN IN ORDER TO MOTIVATE THEM TO ENGAGE IN SEXUAL ACTIVITIES WITH YOU?
The starting point of understanding ‘The 80-20 Rule’ Theory is to ask the question, “What does a man have to offer a woman in order to motivate that woman to agree to engage in sexual activities with him?”
TOP TIER MEN
Let’s start with the men who are part of the ‘top tier’ (or considered the crème de la crème of men in terms of looks and sex appeal).
There are some men who not only can motivate women to agree to engage in sexual activities with them, but more specifically, they can motivate women to engage in short-term and/or non-monogamous ‘casual’ sex with them without offering to ‘wine and dine’ these women or offer them any type of monetary compensation or financial favors. In addition, they will rarely if ever offer to spend any significant amount of time with these women in a non-physical, non-sexual manner.
These are the men who will typically be able to engage in casual sex with women that many men would have to offer long-term monogamy to and/or some type of monetary compensation or long-term financial security to.
I would loosely estimate that approximately 5% of men in society fall into this category.
SECOND TIER MEN
Right below the men in the Top 5% would be men who are able to motivate women to engage in sexual activities with them without offering them any direct monetary compensation or long-term financial security … BUT … these men, at a minimum, must offer to spend at least a few hours per day and/or per week with these women in a non-physical, non-sexual manner in addition to the time they spend with these women being physical and sexual with them. These men might even have to promise to get one of their female sex partners pregnant.
These men are what I would refer to as your “second tier” men. I would estimate that approximately 15% of men in society fall into this category.
The men from the top tier and second tier would comprise what some would refer to as your “Top 20% of most sexually desirable men” in society.
MIDDLE TIER MEN
Without question, the largest percentage of men in society fall into this “middle tier.” These are men that would never be able to motivate a woman to have sex with them purely based on their level of physical attractiveness and/or their charismatic personality and their sense of seductive charm.
These men will have to essentially “negotiate” sex with women. In other words, they have to approach women with an attitude of, “I will provide THIS for you and THAT for you in exchange for you being a regular, dependable sex partner of mine for the next few hours, the next few days, the next few weeks, the next few months, or the next few years.”
At the top of that negotiating list is usually going to money. It could be an amount of money that is directly given to the woman (what is known as ‘tricking’), but in many cities and countries, tricking is actually synonymous with “soliciting a prostitute,” which is illegal.
A more indirect way of providing a woman with financial compensation is what is known as ‘wining and dining.’ This is when a man avoids giving women money directly, but instead, the man offers women free meals for a specific period of time, free social events (e.g., free movie tickets, free concert tickets, etc.) for a specific period of time, free material gifts and possessions (e.g., automobiles, clothing, jewelry, etc.), and free housing (i.e., the woman’s rent or mortgage is paid as well as their electricity, gas, phone, cable television, et al).
Along with financial and material compensation, many men in this category usually must promise to co-parent any children that come from their sexual activities, and provide adequate long-term financial support for those children. A possible exception to this scenario is what is known as a man playing the role of a “house husband.” When a man is a house husband for a woman who is his wife, this means that he is not necessarily obligated to provide major long-term financial support for his children and/or his wife’s children (from another man), but instead, he must sacrifice any career aspirations he may have had in order to stay in the home and look after his growing children while his career-minded wife operates as the financial ‘bread winner’ in the family. The husband would become the male equivalent to a stay-at-home mother and housewife.
I would estimate that no less than probably 60-70% of heterosexual men fall into some variation of this middle tier category.
BOTTOM TIER MEN
The remaining 10-20% of heterosexual men fall into the unfortunate “bottom tier” of men. These are men who will always struggle to attract and maintain the sexual interest of women who they cross paths with.
Some men from this category may luck up and find a wife, but will soon find themselves involved in a marriage that resembles more of a purely platonic friendship that rarely if ever involves (regular) sex. If children are involved, this is what many people refer to as a “co-parenting union,” which is representative of when a man and a woman – who for all practical purposes are just “good friends” – decide to get married or cohabitate, and have children together.
In worst case scenario, many men in this category will become addicted to masturbating to internet porn and/or become a regular client of street prostitutes, professional Call Girls, and upscale Erotic Escorts.
Hypothetically, if all men and women lived in a society where nothing but strictly monogamous marriages were heavily encouraged and enforced, and sex outside the context of marriage was strictly prohibited, then the validity of ‘The 80-20 Rule’ Theory would be severely diminished virtually overnight.
The reality is, we now live in a wide open society that regularly tolerates very loose sexual morals, values, and ethics. There is no predictable change coming at anytime in the near future. Women are far more promiscuous, polyamorous, and hypergamous than at anytime in U.S. history.
Therefore, there will always be men who will have their pick of the litter as far as access to the romantic and sexual companionship of beautiful, sexy women goes … and conversely, there will always be other men who will remain romantically and sexually frustrated to one degree or another throughout the course of their entire adult life. The difference in the lifestyles between these men will continue to become more and more pronounced in the decades to come.
In summary, it is more than okay to consider ‘The 80-20 Rule’ Theory very active and extremely valid. Keep this in mind.
More about Alan Roger Currie can be found on Wikipedia.org; Visit Currie’s main website to find out more about his Email consultations, Skype & Telephone consultations, and One-on-One / Face-to-Face Coaching sessions. Currie also has an active YouTube channel where he offers his own unique brand of knowledge, wisdom, insight, and general advice related to dating and relationships. If you are a single heterosexual man, and you want advice on how to develop the confidence and courage to be more upfront, specific and straightforwardly honest about your sexual desires, interests, and intentions with women, check out Currie’s eBooks, paperbacks, and audiobooks. Currie has been a featured speaker at many dating advice workshops for men in the United States as well as internationally.