I’m going to tell a story. There were two men going for job at a large department store. One showed up to the interview with a polo shirt, jeans, and a pair of athletic shoes. The other man showed up with a crisp white shirt, a neck tie, slacks with a crease in them, and freshly shined dress shoes. Even though the first man was more qualified for the position the second man got the job based on his presentation. The second man’s style got him a well-paying job.
Often when style is talked about particularly in the Black Manosphere sector of social media it has to do with getting the attention of attractive women. A man’s style does that. A nice pair of shoes can get a woman wet. A man’s style is bigger than getting a woman. Men need to understand that. A man’s style is a currency that can help him navigate through life. Let me share another story involving a young woman I knew.
When I was working in an office environment there was a young lady who worked who quite frankly dressed closer to a prostitute than the government worker that she was. Indeed she often complained of strange men walking up to her on the street and offering her money. Now this young lady was a very talented person. She was very good at her job. I supervised her on a few occasions and would grade her efforts as greatly exceeding expectations. Yet she wasn’t taken seriously by the other supervisors on the job because of her daily attire. Then something changed for her.
A female supervisor took her to the side and explained to her that her style of dress was keeping her from advancing. The young lady was receptive to the advice and immediately began to dress more conservatively. As a result she was able to advance quickly on the job to the point that she was given more opportunities to lead different projects.
Even though I used a woman as an example there are definite lessons for men. The way a man presents himself is very important. I’ve seen grown men who walk around dressed like they are teenagers. I’ve even witnessed grown men with gray hair walking around with their pants sagging and wearing jerseys like they are young men. These same men seemed to have a lot time on their hands.
Though people may argue that it isn’t fair we are all treated according to the image people have of us. If a man walks around in unkempt clothes and poor grooming he will be treated like a bum. This man could be a millionaire and yet he will treated like a bum because of his image. Let me share another story.
I knew a man who lived at a rooming house in Washington, DC. To this day I’m not sure how he paid for the room because he never seemed to work and he had a lot of free time on his hands. Anyway to eat every day he would throw on a shirt and tie, a blazer, slacks, and nice shoes and go to different hotels in downtown DC to look for conferences. As a result of looking nice and having the gift of gab he would be able to get free meals because he looked like he belonged based on how he was dressed.
Any man who wants to truly navigate life needs to consciously work to project a positive image to the world. Fair or not first impressions go a long way. It’s the difference between living a life of wealth and abundance or poverty and scarcity.
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