Can You Identify The Simp?

Simp

Aaron

7:00 am – Alarm goes off

7:01 am – Aaron checks his phone to see if Michelle texted him…she didn’t

7:01 am – He sends her his customary “good morning text”

Aaron: Good morning sexy! I hope you have a great day today! 🙂

7:02 am – He stares at his phone and waits for her response…it doesn’t come

7:04 am – He takes his morning piss…with his phone in his hand

7:05 am – Aaron puts his phone on the sink and turns up the volume

7:06 am – He gets in the shower

7:09 am – Lathered in soap, he reaches for his phone to see if Michelle responded to his text…she didn’t

7:11 am – Still in the shower, Aaron checks his phone again…nothing

7:17 am – Aaron gets out of the shower and checks his phone and Michelle still hasn’t responded

7:32 am – Aaron gets dressed and heads to work

7:42 am – He stops at McDonalds for his daily sausage egg and cheese biscuit, large coke, and apple pie breakfast

7:52 am – Aaron swings by a convenience store close to work to grab an energy drink and a snickers bar for a snack later on

7:59 am – He sits down at his desk when his phone buzzes…it’s Michelle!

Michelle: Hey

Kevin

4:30 am – Alarm goes off

4:32 am – Takes his morning piss

4:37 am – Packs his gym bag and throws on some sweats and a t-shirt

4:44 am – Drinks a small cup of black coffee and a bottle of water

4:46 am – Grabs his keys and his gym bag and leaves

4:47 am – Kevin realizes he forgot his phone so he goes back in to get it

4:55 am – Arrives at the gym

7:04 am – Finishes his workout and heads home

7:14 am – Arrives at home and drinks a protein shake

7:23 am – Takes a shower

7:32 am – Makes scrambled eggs, sausage, and whole wheat toast for breakfast and packs a steak salad for lunch

7:45 am – Leaves for work

7:55 am – Kevin sits down at his desk and checks his phone

4:45 am – James: Yo I’m leaving now. And bring extra chalk. I ran out yesterday.

6:14 am – Katrina: Morning baby boy. How did you sleep last night?

6:37 am – Michelle: Hey you I had fun last night 😉 I’m free after I get off if you wanna go for round 2! XOXO

7:32 am – Jasmine: WTF happened to you last night? I waited all night. Did you fall asleep?

Aaron

8:00 am – He sends Michelle a text

Aaron: How’s your day so far? Mine’s been business as usual. I binge watched Game Of Thrones and ate like a whole pizza last night lol What’d you do last night?

8:01 am – He waits for her response…nothing

8:02 am – Aaron puts his phone on his desk and props it up so he can see the screen and gets to work

10:30 am – His phone buzzes

Michelle: Pretty good so far. Went to bed early last night.

Aaron: Ahhh I see! I was wondering why I hadn’t heard from you. Getting that beauty sleep eh? 🙂

Waits for a response…doesn’t get one so he texts again:

Aaron: What are you up to tonight? I was thinking we could go grab a bite to eat if you’re not busy.

Michelle: Oh that sounds good! I’ll have to let you know though. I might have to work late tonight.

Aaron: Let’s hope not! Keep me posted 🙂

Kevin

7:56 am – Shoots a text to James:

Kevin: Don’t feel bad about not locking out at 450 man. It took me a while to get there.

7:57 am – He puts away his phone and gets to work

Aaron

12:01 pm – He eats lunch at Burger King where he flirts with Danielle, a fat cashier with 3 kids and 2 baby daddies, on a daily basis

1:00 pm – He checks his phone…nothing

1:45 pm – He checks his phone…nothing

2:24 pm – He checks his phone…nothing

3:07 pm – His phone buzzes…it’s his mother asking him if he’s coming over for dinner on Sunday and why he hasn’t settled down with a “nice girl” yet.

5:00 pm – Aaron leaves work with his eyes glued to his phone all the way home.

Kevin

12:00 pm – He eats his steak salad and drinks a bottle of water for lunch

12:15 pm – Kevin pulls out his tablet and researches ways to increase one’s max dead lift to help out his buddy James

12:20 pm – He pulls out his phone and shoots James a few links he found

12:23 pm – James: Thanks brotha! I think I’ll try the sumo style. A wider stance might put me over the top. Btw me and Dave are meeting up at the garage around 5 to put the engine block in the Charger tonight. You in?

Kevin: I’m in. I just bought a new socket set so I’ll bring those.

James: See you there.

12:27 pm – He responds to his harem

12:27 pm – Response to Katrina: Slept good. I’m coming over later on. Not sure what time.

12:28 pm – Response to Michelle: We’ll see. I’m working on restoring a classic hot rod with my buddies after work. I’ll let you know.

12:29 pm – Response to Jasmine: Got hung up on a project. Let’s meet up tomorrow.

12:30 pm – He puts his phone away and gets back to work

4:30 pm – Kevin leaves work

4:38 pm – He stops by his place to change and grab his socket set

4:48 pm – He leaves for the garage to meet up with James and Dave

Aaron

5:34 pm – He sends a text to Michelle:

Aaron: Hey you still at work?

6:14 pm – Michelle responds:

Michelle: Yeah but they might let us leave soon if you’re still up to get something to eat

Aaron: Definitely! I’ll call ahead and make a reservation 🙂

Michelle: K

Kevin

7:48 pm – After finishing up with the Charger, he checks his phone:

12:28 pm – Katrina: Okay no problem. I’ll be ready. Just send me a text when you’re on your way 😉

12:29 pm – Michelle: Cool! That sounds like fun! I get off early today and I’m not doing anything after so if you have time I’d love to see you 😉

12:30pm – Jasmine: Fine lol you know I can’t stay mad at you 🙂 What time tomorrow?

6:09 pm – Katrina: Hey you still coming over? I’m making tacos if you’re hungry I’ll save you some!

6:34 pm – Michelle: I’m home and waiting for you 😉

7:50 pm – He responds:

Response to Katrina: On my way. I’m gonna shower at your place.

Response to Michelle: Got plans tonight. We’ll hang out another time.

Response to Jasmine: I’ll let you know.

7:51 pm – Katrina: Okay baby! I’ll make sure you have a clean towel. See you soon! 😀

7:52 pm – Michelle: 🙁 That sux. How bout tomorrow? I miss you.

7:53 pm – Jasmine: K 🙂

8:20 – Kevin gets to Katrina’s place, fucks her, takes a shower, eats a few tacos, then fucks her again

9:40 – He heads home

10:00 – He goes to bed

Aaron

7:53 pm – His phone buzzes

Michelle: Hey I’m ready to go! Can you come get me?

Aaron: I’m on my way!

Michelle: Awesome! Btw I’m broke as a joke. I hope that’s okay 🙁

Aaron: C’mon baby girl you know you don’t pay when you’re with me Leave your wallet at home. All I need is you sexy 🙂

Michelle: OMG you’re the best! See you soon!

9:48 pm – Aaron pays the $78 bill and drops Michelle off at home

10:17 pm – Aaron gets home and sends Michelle a text

Aaron: I had a great time tonight! Thank you for another wonderful evening!

Take Away

In case you haven’t noticed, Aaron’s the simp and Kevin clearly is not. The many differences between these two are the reason for their success and failure with women:

#1: Aaron wakes up an hour before work, Kevin gets up at the crack of dawn to work out. Aaron has a “dad bod”, Kevin has the body of a Greek God.

#2: Kevin eats better than Aaron. Aaron at at 2 fast food joints for breakfast and lunch while Kevin made both meals at home which are better for him.

#3: Kevin doesn’t respond to his 3 women immediately. He has better shit to do than to pander to females so he responds when it’s convenient for him and he is rewarded with immediate responses. Aaron does the opposite with Michelle and is punished with her indifference and lack of respect for his time.

#4: Kevin is fucking 3 women giving him the abundance mentality. He knows that if one acts up or gets outta pocket, he’s got 2 other girls to fall back on and because of this he doesn’t come off as needy or supplicating which are very attractive to Katrina, Michelle and Jasmine. Aaron has oneitis for Michelle and it shows…and isn’t attractive at all to Michelle (and wouldn’t be to any other women out there).

#5: Kevin has other shit going on in his life. He lifts weights and works, works on classic cars, and spends time with like minded men. Pussy isn’t his priority and it shows when dealing with his women. Women respect men who don’t put them on a pedestal and occupy themselves with other things. Aaron has nothing going on (except weekend dinners at his mother’s place). All he thinks about all day is Michelle and his actions reflect his simphood.

#6: Aaron spends nearly $80 on a woman who only agreed to accompany him when the guy she really wanted to be with blew her off. He didn’t get any pussy and then thanked her for her company. Michelle is turned off by this behavior because she knows she didn’t do anything but show up and eat and didn’t have to put out. Kevin got laid, got fed, and didn’t spend a dime.

So who are you gonna be when dealing with women? Aaron or Kevin?

Want more Donovan Sharpe? Visit his website and checkout his podcast The Sharpe Reality on YouTube, Soundcloud, or iTunes.

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About Donovan Sharpe 96 Articles
Donovan is a sexist son of a bitch who objectifies women by keeping them on their toes, their backs, and their knees where they belong. Although he's been banned on Twitter and YouTube, that doesn't stop him from dropping red pill truth Sunday through Thursday evenings at 7EST/4PST on TSR: Primetime with Donovan Sharpe. Add him on Facebook and follow him on Instagram.