Those of you who read and watch me on the regular know that I’ve had plenty of success with beautiful women over the years. Back in my hay day I was an approach machine. If she was hot and she was around, I hollered. No hesitation.
But when I jumped in head first I quickly learned that you can’t just approach every hot piece of ass you see. Sure, you can always “ambush” a broad out of nowhere who doesn’t see you coming and you might get lucky and get the digits and later get the pussy, but those instances are few and far between and rarely worth the effort.
There are many keys to success with good looking women but it’s important for men to understand that if a woman doesn’t express interest in you, there’s no need to approach her. No, a woman’s not going to say to you “Hey, I find you attractive. Come talk to me.” As a matter of fact, I’ve ever seen or heard a woman say that to anyone ever.
Women communicate attraction through non verbal body language. In the PUA community, we call these Indicators Of Interest (IOIs). When a woman is attracted to a man there are certain things she does with her body and her eyes. A lot of these can be vague and hard to read but with enough time in the field, you’ll learn to recognize them and act accordingly.
Here are a couple of IOIs women use to tell men to “come hither”.
Prolonged eye contact
Prolonged eye contact is by far and away the #1 way women use to signal attraction to a man. Like men, women like to look at attractive men. If a beautiful woman makes prolonged eye contact with you, she 100% wants you to approach her and strike up conversation.
Now keep in mind there are many different kinds of eye contact. There’s incidental eye contact most people have with each other in passing. Maybe you make eye contact with someone in line at the grocery store, sitting at a traffic light, or passing by at the office. This kind of eye contact is innocuous mostly benign.
There’s also the “I’m not interested” eye contact. You and a female lock eyes for a split second and she looks away. That says to you in no uncertain terms “I see you, but I am not attracted to you.” Never approach a woman looks away from you when you make eye contact. That will be an embarrassing episode to be sure.
The kind of eye contact that is a clear IOI is 2 to 3 second eye contact with a woman. You and a woman lock eyes and you both maintain eye contact for 2 to 3 seconds. To show your dominance, don’t look away. She will always look away first and smile. She will also look down to show submissiveness and attraction. If she keeps eye contact for more than 3 seconds, maintain eye contact and walk over and introduce yourself.
One of my most successful go to lines when this happens to me is “I could tell you were just dying to look at my ass so I figured I’d come over and introduce myself. I’m Donovan, and you are?” And run game from there.
Again, if you make eye contact and she looks away, keep it moving. But if you make and keep prolonged eye contact for at least 2 seconds, don’t look away. Make her look down to break eye contact and then approach.
Getting loud and/or animated around you
It took me a while to figure this one out but when I did, it made all the difference in the world. When I was out and looking my absolute best, I noticed that I would hear girls around me talking a little more than usual. Some girls would get loud and some girls would talk at an elevated volume. Nothing out of the ordinary there, I thought. I figured they were just really engrossed in whatever conversation they were having…
…but it kept happening. Whether I was at the all, the grocery store, the coffee shop, wherever, I found myself privy to the conversations of pretty women all around me at these places. I also noticed that they would get more animated while talking, using hand gestures that were highly noticeable.
It wasn’t until I started actually looking at these broads when I hear that first elevated word when I noticed that more often than not they were looking in my direction. They would quickly look away when I looked in their direction but after a while it became clear to me that they were trying to get my attention.
This particular technique is probably one of the most used by women that most men are completely clueless about. They hear a girl talking loudly, look in their direction (which is what she wants), sees that she’s animated, but they never see that she is looking at him to make sure he is watching. Most men think to themselves “I wish that chick would shut the fuck up already.” I was definitely in that camp until I saw the light.
When girls get loud animated around you, it means they want your attention. When I figured this out, I would look in her direction again until she made eye contact with me. If she held eye contact with me for 2 to 3 seconds (as stated above), I walked over and introduced myself, which is exactly what she wanted in the first place.
So the next time you walk into an establishment and you all of a sudden hear a woman’s voice talking (as most women keep their voices to an audible level so only the person she is talking to can hear her), look in her direction and check her out. You will likely see her quickly look away to verify that you’ve taken the bait. You’ll still hear her talking when you look away but if you look again, make sure you keep looking until she looks at you. And if she makes and keeps eye contact with you, approach away.
You should also be aware that your girl will also do these things if she sees someone she’s attracted to. Girlfriends and wives alike use this covert method to get the attention of men they’re attracted to. So if you’re out with your girl and she all of a sudden gets loud and animated, look around. Chances are there’s an attractive man in your proximity. At which point you tell you woman “settle the fuck down…he saw you.”
Don’t waste your time
One of my great regrets is all the time I wasted talking to girls who weren’t interested. Yes, it’s important for men to approach as many women as possible to increase their chances to sleep with beautiful women but it is foolhardy to hit on any hot piece of ass that moves.
Make sure she’s showing indicators of interest before you move in for the kill. There’s nothing wrong with a straight up cold approach but keep in mind your success rate will be much lower because she hasn’t expressed interest yet. I’ve fucked beautiful women on cold approaches. But I’ve fucked far more hot girls who made eye contact with me or showed me with their body language that they wanted me to approach.
Good luck out there gents.