Every man here knows at least one woman whom posed the question, “Who does a man love more? The woman he lies to or the woman he tells the truth to?”
In other words, if we men are going to “cheat,” why even get involved in a monogamous relationship at all?
Which raises the new eternal question for the 21st century here in the Western world: Polygyny versus polyandry?
Where should we even begin
Okay, ladies, listen up. We’re going to assume this is a peek into one couple’s world. They can’t see us invading their privacy. She’s you. He’s me.
“Sounds so nasty.”
Prince and Morris Day lyrics aside, let’s just get right the ph*ck down to it. Shall we?
Be that as it may, let’s already assume that we’ve been in a committed relationship for some time now. Let’s also assume that we love each other.
Seem fair enough? It does? Cool.
Now for whatever reason, I’ve stepped out on you with another woman, a mistress, a side chick or probably, in your words, “that whore!”
Now it comes down to the “Why?”
“Why would you cheat on me, Marcus? I’m a good woman. I’m here for you. I’m loyal to you. Why did you lie to me about it?”
And every female I’ve ever encountered (ex-wife, girlfriend, co-worker or friend) over the years, has boldly told me this repeatedly:
“Look, Marcus, as long as my man’s discreet and takes care of me and our children (if there’s any), he can do whatever he pleases.”
Baby, you’re asking questions that you already know the answers to. And that’s why I say that nowadays, I have to agree with having a lifestyle of polygyny.
Now remember, we’re still inside the intimate world of this hypothetical couple. You and me, ladies.
Just consider this, my love: No more lies. Total transparency. Stronger families. Better everything!
Stop praying to Jesus (or whatever deity of your choice), a man whom you’ve never met, and start recognizing me, a real man whom you know, love and can see every day.
Sounds extreme? Perhaps, sweetheart, but hear me out.
Insert dramatic music now
Then suddenly, you go “There’s a flip side to that coin,” as Robert De Niro said in the classic film Heat. “What if you do want a polygamist lifestyle, Marcus, but I want something extra, too?”
“Daph*ck you tawkin’ ‘bout, baby?”
“Yes, that’s right, Marcus. Another man. Hell, two men? Now how would you feel?”
And there it is: polyandry.
You already know it’s about you having two or more men as your husband, boyfriend or that bastard who kills the scary bugs behind the fridge for you. Hey, do whatever blows your hair back.
Then again, baby, quiet as kept, I’m the KANG of the double standard. And when it comes to this polyandry option, I see no reason why to dip now.
Just know that it’s all about staying in tune with nature, sweetheart. See, I truly believe there’ll be more harmony, peace and love within a solid, healthy polygynous relationship.
Because it’s more natural for two or more women to share one husband (or fly-ass non-legally married man) than two men sharing bodily fluids with you, baby. Hashtag: Nasty-as-a-mudda-fudda!
To phrase it another way, a threesome is two women and one man. Whereas two men and one woman is a choo-choo train.
But I digress.
See, I’ve actually experienced a polyandry moment with a past lover. Yes, baby, your Marcus had an opportunity to engage in a polyandry relationship with a badass woman—inside and out with her beautiful self—a long, long time ago.
What had happened was
Well, sweetheart, I had to respectfully decline her offer. See, the other man and I would’ve, no doubt, fought over her fine ass. No bueno.
If you honestly admit to yourselves that most women are already indirectly living a polygamist lifestyle via several baby’s mamas, numerous side chicks and jump offs, you’ll come to realize that that’s counterproductive to a healthy, prosperous life with a man.
You know, baby, you and me?
Besides, just think about all of the wasted resources: money, time and energy. It could’ve all been prevented if you just faced the reality of human nature. We men were meant to love, protect and provide for more than just one woman.
One man to honor
Conversely, most of you women desire only ONE man to honor, respect and love. We’ll just take for granted that endless oral sex is included in this package deal.
Now tell me I’m wrong. Uh-huh. I thought so.
Then there’s the minority of you females whom feel more inclined to have a polyandry thing going down. Yeah, whatever.
Like I said, very few chicks will opt for the latter. Call me crazy but you know I’m right.
Oh, I can hear you now, baby: “But, Marcus, you make it sound like if I don’t get with your program on polygyny, you’ll just cheat any ole way.”
And my rebuttal to this scenario with a fictitious wife/girlfriend who’s pissed the ph*ck off at me at this very moment is this:
No late-night creeping
No, seriously, with all due respect, you’re only calling it “cheating” because it’s being conducted behind your back. Fair enough.
All I’m saying is with polygyny, we eliminate the lying all together. Consider this. You’ll finally have peace of mind, knowing exactly where I’m at every night.
You’ll actually be friends with your sister wives.
Oh, and by the way, if there’s children involved, that only means a bigger and stronger family. Date night? No problem. One of my wives—excuse me, I meant one of your sister wives will babysit.
And let’s not forget about the joy of combined finances, baby. Remember that income property that caught our eye but we just didn’t have enough capital to snatch it up? Well, enter Wifey Number Two to assist with a three-point shot from the outside.
Shoot, we’ll live a better life, period. What? You still don’t believe me?
More international travel
I mean real fun without worrying about money issues because it’ll be more than just you and me, my love.
For real, for real? It goes beyond just wild, butt-naked sex.
It’s logical. I can love more than one woman, baby.
Why should either one of us continue to live this lie? That’s illogical.
Case in point, my love: I love to commit. . . just to multiple women. Hard to swallow? Yeah, I know.
But hold up. They do have to come to the table with more than just their tight vagina.
Am I asking for too much?
Nevertheless, though, beautiful, whatever your flavor (polygyny or polyandry), just know that it’s a man’s world.
However, comma, it wouldn’t mean nothing, and I do mean NOTHING, without. . . a fine-azz chick like you giving us some bomb-ass head!
Marcus love is a published author. You can scoop up his most recent Broke and Ashy urban eNovella series at https://www.amazon.com/Marcus-Love/e/B0097PJIHK