The Serial Monogamist: Not Promiscuous, but Not Quite Husband Material Either

Given that we are in the midst of what is known as "Cuffing Season" (a period between Halloween and Valentine's Day where many men and women connect for a short-term strictly monogamous relationship), many Eligible Bachelors who are referred to as 'Serial Monogamists' will be in high demand and will flourish over the next 3 months

Does everyone reading this article know the significance of the period between approximately Saturday, October 27, 2018 and Sunday, February 17, 2019?

Informally and unofficially, this period is generally referred to as “Cuffing Season.” For those unfamiliar with this particular phenomenon, this period lasting approximately three-and-a-half months during the holiday season tends to highlight the concept of short-term monogamous sexual relationships.  Typically, men who are seasoned ‘serial monogamists’ tend to flourish during this period and generally tend to be in high-demand among single (and lonely) women.

WHAT IS A ‘SERIAL MONOGAMIST?’

Many women adore men who seek to enter into a long-term, emotionally profound, strictly monogamous relationship with a woman.  Conversely, many women tend to frown on the idea of men who are referred to as ‘players’ and ‘incorrigible womanizers’ who have a reputation for pursuing women only for short-term non-monogamous ‘casual’ sex (i.e., one-night stands, weekend flings, and other variations of ‘fuck buddy’ sex).

If there is one type of man who is more appealing to women than a prolific womanizer type, but at the same time not quite as appealing as the men who the vast majority of women tend to choose as a long-term romantic companion and/or a future husband, it would be the men who are known as serial monogamists.

A serial monogamist is a man who rarely if ever engages in sexual relations with two or more female lovers concurrently.  Instead, a serial monogamist tends to enter into a series of short-term strictly monogamous sexual relationships with a number of different women over a period of time.

For example, a serial monogamist will maintain a strictly monogamous sexual relationship with Woman #1 for say, six months; Then, after breaking up with Woman #1, this same serial monogamist will then enter into a subsequent strictly monogamous sexual relationship with Woman #2 for say, four months; Then, after breaking up with Woman #2, this same serial monogamist will enter into a strictly monogamous sexual relationship with Woman #3 during Cuffing Season of 2018-2019; Then, after breaking up with Woman #3 right after Valentine’s Day of 2019, he will repeat his cycle of very short-term strictly monogamous sexual relationships with various other women over and over and over again.

SOME CELEBRITY EXAMPLES

There have been a few dozen male celebrities who have been infamously known for being serial monogamists, but a good number of them eventually went ahead and tied the knot and exchanged vows as they got older.  A few of them would include . . .

Warren Beatty (before he got married)
George Clooney (before he got married)
Leonardo DiCaprio
Ryan Gosling
Derek Jeter (before he got married)
Justin Timberlake (before he got married)

EASIER TO MANAGE THAN FULL-BLOWN PROMISCUITY or LONG-TERM POLYAMORY

Many men in society find engaging in one or more episodes of short-term non-monogamous ‘casual’ sex with multiple women to be more ‘exciting’ and egotistically satisfying than being a serial monogamist.  Conversely, a number of other men tend to engage in long-term non-monogamous sex (what is commonly referred to as a ‘polyamorous’ relationship, or an ‘open’ relationship) with two or more lovers who they have developed an emotional bond with.

So, what do some men find appealing about serial (short-term) monogamy as opposed to short-term or long-term non-monogamous sexual relationships?

1)    Being able to offer women a monogamous commitment … without necessarily offering them the promise of a marriage proposal

Comment:  A lot of men have a total lack of desire to seduce and sleep with women who are known to have very overt promiscuous and/or polyamorous tendencies; Being a serial monogamist gives men a greater opportunity to attract women who are very monogamy-oriented without promising these women that they will exchange wedding vows at any point in the near or distant future

2)    Not having to worry about women who have “jealousy” or “possessiveness” issues

Comment:  Even men who indulge in polyamorous (or “open”) marriages and long-term relationships sometimes have to deal with one female lover feeling like she is not receiving as much time, attention, and companionship as the other female lover(s).  Men who are serial monogamists will never have to deal with such an issue.

3)    Serial monogamy is very conducive to men who are not a totally erotically uninhibited “free spirit” type, as well as men who generally want to prevent and avoid developing any sort of ‘controversial’ or ‘unconventional’ reputation among their family, close friends, and other friends and acquaintances within their designated social circle

Comment:  Some men, for better or for worse, just do not have the courage or strength of character to deal with having a long-term reputation as a ‘player’ or ‘womanizer,’ or having to explain to their more prudish and status quo friends and family members as to why they are involved in an ‘open relationship’ with two or more steady female lovers.  Serial monogamy allows men to experience the sexual companionship of a variety of women while still allowing them to maintain a generally ‘wholesome’ reputation as a “monogamy-oriented gentleman.”  The downside for these men is that many of these men will inevitably develop a reputation as a “heartbreaker,” which sometimes is viewed among women as being worse than having a reputation as a promiscuous womanizer.

Once again, Cuffing Season is arguably the best time of the year to experiment with the benefits of operating as a serial monogamist, especially if you live in a city that is known for frigid temperatures during the winter months.

Good luck in your pursuits gentlemen.

Note: Columnist Alan Roger Currie will not have a published article posted on the following dates due to his travel schedule and/or vacation plans:

  • Monday, November 26, 2018
  • Monday, December 24, 2018
  • Monday, December 31, 2018
  • Monday, January 7, 2019

Senior writer Alan Roger Currie was recently named the 2017 Charles Tyler Freelance Writer & Columnist of the Year for the NegroManosphere.com, and he was also named the NegroManosphere.com’s 2017 Best Dating Coach for Men on YouTube and 2017 Black Male YouTube Personality of the Year. More about Alan Roger Currie can be found on Wikipedia.org; Visit Currie’s main website to find out more about his Email consultations, Skype & Telephone consultations, and One-on-One / Face-to-Face Coaching sessions. Currie also has an active YouTube channel where he offers his own unique brand of knowledge, wisdom, insight, and general advice related to dating and relationships. If you are a single heterosexual man, and you want advice on how to develop the confidence and courage to be more upfront, specific and straightforwardly honest about your sexual desires, interests, and intentions with women, check out Currie’s eBooks, paperbacks, and audiobooks. Currie has been a featured speaker at many dating advice workshops for men in the United States as well as internationally. Currie was the first African-American to be a featured speaker at The 21 Convention and was a featured speaker for the second time on Saturday, October 13, 2018 in Orlando, Florida. If you want to become a Patreon.com subscriber of Dating Coach Alan Roger Currie, CLICK HERE

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About Alan Roger Currie 84 Articles
Alan Roger Currie is the author of a number of eBooks, paperbacks, and audiobooks, and is best known for the ground-breaking best-seller "Mode One: Let the Women Know What You're REALLY Thinking"; Currie is also a professional Men's Dating Coach who has worked with clients all over the world, and has conducted speaking engagements and workshops in many cities both in the U.S. and internationally. Contact him at coaching@modeone.net